Coincidence

My sweet girl,

It's the last day of Feb & the signs of Spring are definitely showing. The tulips Bella & I planted in the fall are starting to bloom. I saw two little birds today chirping & flying around a small nest & the Canadian geese have increased in numbers by the lake, pooping all over the side walks & even in people's driveways. I have to cross the street when I walk Rocky because he sometimes tries to eat it just like Juno used to do. :)

This week I'll be looking over the material that Beyond Type One has emailed me & will be mailing me to get ready for our meeting next week. I'm so thankful Debbie will be driving with me & helping me present our case in front of all those big shots. I know my emotions will get the better of me. I will not show up with the confidence of a parent advocate who's trying to change the world.

I will be showing up as a mom who lost her beautiful 10 year old daughter to Type One Diabetes, who she made a promise to, that she would try to other save lives from this disease, because she couldn't save hers...

I will be wearing my heart on my sleeve.

Whether this is the right approach or not, it's all I got.

Because the thought of your passing being preventable, if we just knew....it suffocates me baby girl. It takes over my thoughts & feelings ...it knocks me down to the ground. :(

It's something that I will have to live with for the rest of my life. But others don't. There doesn't have to be any more unnecessary deaths...

...

Today I went to the dentist to get a cavity filled & she asked how I was doing. The same sister dentists that knew you & your sisters. She asked if I could feel your presence. That's the first time anyone ever asked me that question. I told her I can. I told her about all the signs, specially the butterflies.

When I told her about the Haileyfly at the beach, she started to cry. We both sat there with tears running down our faces. She started to tell me about a friend who lost her daughter to leukemia & another woman who lost her husband after a freak accident (he fell down the stairs) who have also had signs & feel their loved ones near.

We started talking about the afterlife & religion. One thing that she said stood out because another mom just posted about it last night- she said that no matter what you believe in, one thing is a fact: energy never dies. If anything, that's what we feel. The energy of our loved ones- which to me equals their spirit.

It was nice to openly talk to someone who knew us "before & after" & not feel awkward, my mouse. I told her too about our meeting next week. She was happy to hear it. She asked me questions about type one too, because she has a two year old son.

At the end she gave me a big hug. Later, when I brought your sisters in for their cleanings, she gave me a print out of two books she read about the afterlife, both written by a well known medium George Anderson? She said she read both books & highly recommends them & thinks I'd like them...

again the subject of mediums.

Coincidence?

I'm starting to not believe in them baby girl.

I love you so much.

I will keep walking on this journey as long as I have you, your sisters, Daddy & my family by my side. And God too.

Everyday, you are on my mind.

Forever,
Your mommy <3

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